Today is 'Special'

Today is very special for me... a cause for personal celebration.

Two years ago today, I smoked my very last cigarette..... HOORAY!!!!!

The fact that this momentous event was followed, within hours, with my heart attack made the moment even more memorable. Memorable because - despite ignoring all the warnings for years - I am among the 'lucky ones' who are still around to tell the tale.

I don't know why I chose to ignore all the advice of 'everyone'. Pressure of work - always away from home - constant long journeys driving on my own - most of my friends smoked too???? So many 'reasons' that some people always saw as excuses.... No I didn't want to give up!!! It was MY life - and MY choice - and that was the end of it! Well it nearly was 'the end of it' - my life that is.

But I survived, and I'm still the same 'happy go lucky' person, though I will admit a little bit (well quite a lot) better off financially than I was before once I became a 'pensioner'. I'm not one of those ex-nicotine addicts who tut tut's every time anyone with a cigarette comes near. I remember quite clearly how nasty some people were to me (and others) when I smoked, and could never be like that.

But I will confess that I have, on just a couple of occasions felt like having a cigarette. The first time was when I was allowed to drive 'on my own' again following the HA. When I shut the car door, latched the seat belt, turned the key and moved off...habit locked in - and just for a fraction of a second - made me think 'cigarette' - and I dismissed it straight away! The second was not too long ago, having been out to a nice meal with the family and when the coffee was served, that 'cigarette thought' re-appeared... But you know what? It was followed immediately by my brain saying to me "Cigarette? But you DON'T smoke".

Then I knew I had won! And, boy it feels really good....

posted by Carole B @ 3:38 PM